Life gets harder

So...where are things...  I can honestly say that things are extremely difficult.  My ex, who refused to leave our house, even after being separated from each other for over 3 years, finally moved out in October.  On December 14th, my wonderful, talented, sparkling, joyful, beautiful Mother passed away from a massive heart attack.  We lost my Father about five and a half years ago.  ...And I'm feeling so panicked, alone, and depressed that it's very hard to breathe.  I wake up in the morning with this sick, intense feeling that something's wrong.  I suddenly remember, "Oh, that's why.  She's gone."  See, I still can't imagine a world where my Mother isn't.  I've told people this before, but it's true...my Father was the voice in my head.  Still is.  So much of what he said and what he taught me reverberates even now.  But.. my Mom was and is the constant presence in my life.  She was everything in the world to me.  Remember what Romeo said?  Something like, everything's fine if she's well - you know, about Juliet?  Well, it goes the opposite way too - everything's wrong if she's not ok.  The whole world has come out of balance, turned upside down, and I'm scrabbling to keep on my feet.  I'm not doing too well my friends. 

    Mom was always there.  By the way, I come from a very large family.  Nine children.  Kathy, one of my sisters, passed away about 17 years ago from a brain tumor.  My other siblings are going through the same feelings that I am.  Mom was fun and loving.  She was the greatest cheerleader for each of us.  Mom could give you a smile that just told you that everything was gonna be alright.  That smile warmed your heart and truly healed all of the wrong in the world.  Now, nothing can ever be alright ever again.  To say that I miss her doesn't really say it.  I feel like I'm missing about five major organs and there's no way I'll ever be able to retrieve them.  How can I live in this world without my Mother?  I know I have to find a way.  I know that she would and does want all of her children to be happy.  We each have to find our way now without her.  But, see, I don't see how that's possible.  She was the light for our way.  She was our heart.  I truly love and miss you Mom, much much more than I could ever say. 

Tuesday's East Coast Earthquake

So..I've been trying to figure out why I've continued to think about my experience with Tuesday's east coast earthquake.  It's haunting me for some reason.  It was truly intense for me and for my daughter.  Please know, I've been through a San Diego earthquake which was an extremely bizarre experience because that was my first.  At San Diego, to which I had gone because of an educational conference, I was sitting on a folding chair on a concrete floor in a resort hotel when the floor became a leviathan.  I was sitting there and my sense of reality changed.  San Diego's experience went on for quite a while and I was really shocked or had gone into shock afterward for a few hours.  But even with that experience, it pales next to yesterday's earthquake.  Why?  San Diego's was a higher seismic measurement.  But my experience here was truly terrifying and I think I know why.  About 1pm my daughter, who had been working on the computer, came walking out onto the porch where I was sitting reading a book, and she say's "What's happening Mom? The house is shaking."  She had started to feel the movement inside.  Suddenly, while I sitting there and she was standing there, both of us staring out toward our yard, our house starting not just shaking but moving horizontally.  I watched my front porch columns go horizontally back and forth.  The sound was truly eery and I had a dreadful feeling.  My daughter and I grabbed each other's hands and held on as strongly as we could.  I said to her "This is an earthquake."  We literally watched our front lawn move sideways and up and down.  This is truly not an exaggeration.  Our experience went on for at least one full minute.  ...and I can't stop thinking about it.  Right afterward my daughter literally broke down and wept in shock.  I was in shock as well, but I had to be brave for her and just kept telling her that it was ok and everything was fine.  Those who josh about east coast earthquakes vs. west coast earthquakes really don't get it.  At least from where I was sitting, this was a truly intense and terrifying experience. 

Breedables on Second Life

Confession:  I have recently started doing Second Life more often because of one reason and one reason only:  Breedables!  Meeroos are prairie dog/kangaroo critters who grow, breed, send out hearts, openly ask to be cuddled, and are absolutely addicting!  For a small fee of 50 lindens for each nest, I was able to birth each of my three meeroos from their nests and set them up(with a trunk home and enough food for all three) in my second life home.  My first meeroo is named I Love You Cutie Pie, second one is Melindarina, and my third is Buster.  All three have the potential to breed, so I'm looking forward to finding one of the girls expecting any time.  One of the most wonderful things about meeroos is that you can pet them and they can be picked up and cuddled!  Their eyes draw you in.  They're just soooooooooooooo adorable!
     Ok, so the meeroos got me started, and then I started looking around for other breedables and came across....KittyCats!! The KittyCats breedable is truly unique in that the cats are absolutely GORGEOUS, they send out butterflies and hearts when they're happy or want to be hugged, they can be picked up and cuddled with a very adorable animation!  I have two KittyCats at this time.  My first I named Boo Boo and the second is Miu Miu.  Because of the fact that I have scarce prims available, I decided to click off breeding ability so that they would only be pets.  But they truly must be the most beautiful scripted animals on second life!  Since finding about KittyCats, I have also found out about another breedable cat called WildWood cats.  These cats are somewhat less interactive.  The WildWood cats can't be picked up and cuddled, but they're very cute, a bit more cartoonish than the KittyCats, but I love the way the WildWood cats move.
     So, what about dogs, you ask?  I found out about BioBreed dogs recently.  I decided I absolutely had to have a BioBreed dog, so I paid 25 lindens for a puppy box, clicked it to birth the dog and ended up with a very cute yellow lab!  The BioBreed dogs are also less interactive than the meeroos and KittyCats because you can't pick them up, but you can set their home and they'll walk around and basically be very cute.
     The only two aspects about breedables that are somewhat of a concern are a)  food - Each variety of breedable requires to be fed on a regular basis.  That's what I'm assuming the makers of these animals make most of their money on, since one can only buy food for each variety from the main store of each of the companies.  b)  prims - I own a Linden home which only allows for a limited amount of prims.  I now own 7 animals and have gotten rid of all furniture and other items which take up prims.  I'm in complete need of more prims and I am looking around. 
     All in all, breedables have truly made my experience in Second Life MUCH more fulfilling, enjoyable and fun!  Plus, they're all just so incredibly cute!

American Girl Store Visit at Tyson's Corner!!

 My daughter Shelby and I had a FANTASTIC time at the new Tyson's Corner American Girl store!  We decided to make a long weekend of it.  Having made a reservation at the Tyson's Corner Marriott with an American Girl package, we arrived at the hotel on Thursday.  After checking in, we went up to the room and were met by a very nice woman who gave Shelby a pink American Girl doll bed as well as made the bed up with a pink coverlet and an American Girl pillow!  Shelby was thrilled!  We decided to take a complimentary shuttle to the American Girl store.  As soon as we walked into the store it was obvious that, as my daughter said, "This is a dream come true!"  Shelby had such a wonderful time walking around both floors of beautiful, detailed, historic exhibits of the American Girl dolls.  She ooohed and ahhed when looking at the Bitty Babies who were sooooo cute.  After a few hours of walking around, we went back to the hotel and had a wonderful lunch at the Marriott Steak house, and Shelby decided that her doll Chrissa just had to sit and eat with us!  Tyson's Corner also houses a HUGE assortment of different kinds of stores including a Disney store, a theatre, all sorts of department stores, Build A Bear store, and many others.  We walked around for hours.  Shelby decided later that Chrissa just had to get her ears pierced.  We walked back to the American Girl store, made an order to get Chrissa's ears pierced and walked around a bit more.  Going back to the Salon area, we found out that the piercing also came with a complimentary set of earrings for Shelby's dolls.  This American Girl visit turned out to be a TRULY wonderful, memorable, and FUN time!

I'd Rather Be Reading...

Recently, I've been systematically rereading ALL of the Harry Potter books, The Hobbit and ALL of  Lord of the Rings, and the most recent Diana Gabaldon series books - the last one and most recent called Echo in the Bone.  What do all of these books have in common?  If I'm honest, I would say... length.  But more importantly - epic aspects in the face of fantasy.  All of these books are a BLAST to read.  They all include well thought out characters, very specific details ( even about food the characters eat) and extraordinarily poignant relationships.  The fantasy aspects of all HP books are pretty obvious, as well as all of the LOTR, but Gabaldon's fantastic aspect has to do with time travel and the author's theory of time travel.  All of these series also include a climactic resolution to the entire series which is complex and worthy of a detailed reread in order to completely decipher and make sense of the specific details that led toward the resolution.  I absolutely LOVE them all!  All in all...I'd always rather be reading...

Child turns 12!

My daughter is now 12!  She's into American Girl dolls, Disney Channel shows like Shake It Up, Good Luck Charlie, and ANT Farm...She's starting to do research (read look into) books and classes about babysitting, hoping to begin to babysit sometime in the fall.  Her favorite foods include Peanuts and Phineas and Ferb chewy snacks and homemade nachos...She LOVES magazines like TWIST and Tiger Beat, BOp and J14, as well as all sorts of dog magazines.  She has a subscription to Teen Vogue and Dog World.  Her favorite books include Stuart Little (still), Twilight series, ALL the Harry Potter books, and Candy Apple series.   One of her favorite things to do is to pet her dog and yell "Bubba" to him.  Her iTouch has hundreds of apps, but her favorite is probably Angry Birds.  She loves the beach, her family, playing with her friends, and taking long walks with her dog.  I adore and love her very very much!  So, as you can see, she is the center of my life.